When you find yourself.

When you find yourself. 

Who you find you are, not what others say you are. 

“I’ll love you, forever.”

“You are loved, I love you.”

“When I say I love you, I mean it.”

“I forgive you.”

“I want to take you to dinner.”

These statements do not seem bad at all, do they ? .... I have found them to be coercive, manipulative, controlling, and less than honest. 

When people say ‘nice things’ but their actions are far from the words, I have learned to trust the actions, not the words. 

I am Hope. 

I have Hope. 

I have been abused, manipulated (others trying to change my values and core beliefs.) and emotionally beat up.

I am Hope. I have trust issues with people, but not God. I have learned over the last few decades  that I am loved unconditionally. The past and even current manipulation is becoming easier for me to see. I do not always see it, because it's second nature to me to be ‘told what to do’ and not stand up for myself. 

I believe God, and His word.  He tells me the Truth. I am loved, unconditionally, purely, as I am, without regret or manipulation. I found pure love in my relationship with God, through His son Jesus Christ. 

He never ever has a harmful plan for me, God never has:

Abandoned me.

Narcissism.

Manipulation.

A memory of my mistakes.

Revenge towards me…

When I learned that rejection was a gift, I understood that concept completely. How else would I have found God? 

As a youth I suffered loss and abandonment. 

As a teen I suffered from an abortion.

As an adult I found my peers were manipulating me and emotionally gas-lighting me to gain control of me. 

I thank God now for it. Because when others say, “there is no God, he is just a panacea.” I know personally this is not true. Faith has been proven to me over and over and over again, I know God. God knows me. 

He wants us all to know His love and care. He is nearby, He is here!

So, how do I count the suffering as a gain? I found my loss was my path to Truth and the rejection, and abuse showed me the ‘opposite’ of love and when true Love came, I knew it. 

You too can know Truth, and Love. True Love. 

How can we trust in God we can not see? How can we even think of a Being so powerful that he allows suffering. Isn’t suffering bad? Isn’t loss bad?

Well, what IF…

What if loss is the road to gain: Freedom. Love. Purity? Is it a loss?

What if poverty, abandonment, abuse, rejection, manipulation, or bad health opens your heart to the pains of others? What if it changes you, for good? Is that a bad thing?

Christians in the western world want to be coddled, protected, safe, blessed, told that this too shall pass. That is not the Whole Gospel. God has a much stricter road to salvation. 

Tribulation, Pain, Suffering, Poverty, Abandonment, Loss of Love, Beatings, and sometimes Death. 

You may ask, “Then WHY would I want to be Christian?” “Why would I choose to follow Christ?”

Those are good questions and my answer is this.

“Abandonment, being abused, neglected… These sad events helped me see a better way, and when I heard of a God who loved me for me, He made me and wanted me to be in His family, I was joyful to be in a family that knew I was valuable!”

I have met Christian believers in Fiji, Iceland, Canada, USA, Mexico, Bangladesh, Pakistan and the common trait is joy for a love that never ends. Security for eternity. 

Wealth ends. Attention ends. Family ends. Human love ends. But God is never changing and His love never ends.

Not all christians are Believers, and not all believers are christian.  

Matthew 7:16 ‘By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thorn bushes, or figs from thistles?”

I thank God I am continually finding my value in His love for me. 

What would you give up for Eternal, Unconditional Love? 

Would you give up fear? Worry? Loneliness?  Doubt?

I would give my life for the One who saved mine. He saved me from myself and from Hell. 

If you have a need for love, I hope you will read the Bible. From Genesis to Revelation, we see Gods’ plan for mankind. 

He is returning, one day. Please ask God to forgive you, Jesus to redeem you and Holy Spirit to fill you. Power for Godly living is yours if you give up your life to the one who died to save it. 

Hope here.